An apple a day...

So last week ended with a trip to the doctor for me.  I was having dizziness getting up from a lying position, and shortness of breath when I was laying down.  Yeah, I know.

An EKG confirmed what I suspected- right bundle block in the heart.  My doctor was not comfortable sending me home, so I took a trip over to our local hospital ER.  EKG was confirmed abnormal and blood work showed that I have an elevated d dimer which is a fibrin degradation product- a small protein fragment present in the blood after a blood clot is degraded by fibrinolysis.  In short, pulmonary thrombosis.  Yeah, I know.

A cat scan showed that there were no clots in the lungs.  Good news, but why the elevated d dimer?  Why the abnormal EKG?  I'm seeing a cardiologist this week.  Given my family history, heart stuff was to be expected with me- but at 46 it seems a little soon.

I'm going to take a bit of a blog break this week until I figure out what is going on with me.  I feel like Dr.House and the internet has way too much information for a person like me.  You should have seen me as a psychology major.  I was ready to check myself into the nearest institution, because I was sure I had every psychosis and neurosis in the book.  

I'll keep y'all posted.  Until then, have a great week!

Happy Birthday to me...

Today I am 45 years old.  That is just five years shy of half a century.  I don't feel 45...

What does that mean exactly?  I don't feel 45?  I don't feel it on the inside- in fact I still call my mom and dad to ask questions and verify information.  But the outside of me?  Yeah, I am so pushing half a century.

I used to look like this a couple of years ago:

Thin, but not healthy.  That was a skinny by stress diet- and let me tell you, it's not fun and the results are not worth it.

When I quit teaching I vowed that I was going to spend quality time with my family.  Dinners around the table, good food, dessert- the works!

Combine that with the fact that I do not like to exercise and well, you can do the math.  I've gained at least 25 pounds in one year.  That doesn't sound too horrible, unless you factor in that I am only 5 feet tall.  Right now the extra weight is not bothering me on the level of what size I wear.  In the above picture I was a size two...now I am a size 12.  I am a hippy girl with big boobs, even when I'm thin...so a few extra pounds really accentuates the hips, but with a tiny waist.

I am pretty honest with myself.  I am not going to stop cooking yummy food for my family- no extreme diets or cleanses.   I am going to try and throw in some exercise because I think it may be my best option to be more healthy.  So for a girl who hates to exercise, what were my options?

Y'all know I love zombies...so I bought this app for my iphone:

Zombies RUN!

I figure some fast walking, because please- I do not run, would get me the exercise I need to balance out the foods I eat.   I always used to joke that I wouldn't run even if I was being chased by zombies, but since I've never actually been chased by zombies, I don't know that to be entirely true.

I'll check back in on this in about a month.  I'm going to make a few changes in my eating habits and throw in some of these zombie runs.  We will see.  The goal is healthy, not skinny- keeping that in mind as I start this.  

Do you hear shuffling feet and moaning?  I'd like to say that is the zombie app, but it may be me....

Future Bride of Frankenstein....Updated!

Surgery is today on the right hand.  After a nerve test on both hands that involved shocks and very long needles they have decided that I only need surgery on my right hand.  Yay!  Recovery time is ten days- then I should be able to get back to painting :)

Taking a rest...

I found this on Kristin's blog Domestically Unemployed.  She does a Monday motivation post each week, and I'm sure she has no idea how much it has spoken to me over the past few weeks.  

Long story short, I suck at taking care of myself.  I am having some complications with my health that have been going on for a long time while I was busy working- so I ignored it.

Until I couldn't ignore it anymore.  Not smart.  I know.  

I finally got in to see a specialist last week and it looks like my October and November are going to be booked solid with tests, procedures, surgery and such.  Yay for "fall".  (so aptly named!)

I need to rest.  I need to exercise and my doctor even recommended yoga.  At least that would give me an excuse to wear those comfy yoga pants ; o )

I will keep blogging simply because I find it relaxing and therapeutic to post.  

Take care of yourself- your health really is everything.

Post-Op...

Surgery went well. I am meeting my opth today for a quick check, then off to finish up a few Christmas things. Frozen peas are my new best friend.

Well, that and my new Brighton Hollywood shades.

Sleep, my pretty, sleep...

I don't think I realized the energy I was spending in keeping it all together. In all reality I had totally accepted the fact that I had cancer. The breast diag thought so, the surgeon thought so...and I spent all that damn time and energy convincing my husband and family that I could do it and I'd be fine.

Truth is I wasn't fine, and now I am tired. Wednesday night I was in bed by 7:45 and it was all Travis could do to pull me out at 6 am to get to school.

Another thing was going on in the cottage during this time. My oldest son moved out to go live with his dad. It was sudden and not all too unexpected, but still difficult to swallow. He has been there since Sept.17th- and was not even around the corner when he called and asked to come back home. I said no. Our rule has always been that if you leave it's for a year. We never wanted the kids to "skate" back and forth between mom and dad's houses just because they were pissed. He is pulling his grades up (again) and still dating a girl that we really don't know that well. I see the Facebook stuff between them, but other than that I am pretty out of the loop regarding his life.

School this year has been amazing. I am thrilled to be where I am and loving every minute of it. My team is fun and incredibly talented to work with. I finally found a place where I fit in and it feels great.

I really need to post some new house photos. Travis went back on shift this past month and joined the fire department at work- something that he's always wanted to do. I have to admit there is nothing sexier than my husband in bunker gear. Pretty hot! I'm hoping that on his next long change he can start work on our laundry room.

Thank you all for your sweet words and support this past month- it meant a lot to me to read your comments : )

Now I can get back to posting the fluffy stuff!

Woot!

The official diagnosis: Fibrocystic change with apocrine metaplasia.


Whatever....


It's BENIGN!!

It's complicated...

So the Breast center called me and they want me to go see a surgeon for an extraction biopsy. Turns out that the stereotactic biopsy isn't going to cut it for whatever they think is going on in the right breast.

Y'all know what a fan of needles I am.

But at least I'll be asleep for it.

I go tomorrow afternoon for my consult with the surgeon.

I can do this.

It is what it is...

I went back to the breast center to get my re-squish done on the right breast. Also an ultrasound (so weird to look at that screen and not see baby parts!).

The result? Well, I noticed it right away- not your typical calcifications, but a large grouping of small ones that are clustered behind the nipple.

Next up: a stereotopic core biopsy scheduled for the 23rd. They gave me a script for a 10 mg valium, which if anyone knows me well will understand that unless I chase it with a fifth of vodka that little pill is not going to keep me lying still on a table while they hack into my boob.

Wish me luck...