Embracing Mommyhood

I am not a "natural mom"  by that I mean that I am not very coddle like, nurturing, or lovey.  Even still, I always knew that I wanted to be a mom.

Growing up I had the best example of what a mom should be.  My mom made homemade cakes and gave the best birthday parties, teaching me that birthdays were special.  Holidays were made memorable by how she would buy the PERFECT gifts for us, ones that said she really knew us and that she took the time to think about how the gift would fit our interests.  My mom would drive us to the bus stop (literally outside our driveway and to the corner stop sign) and sit with us in the car if it rained so that we would not get wet waiting.  She packed lunches that screamed I LOVE YOU, both in the food content and the little notes she put in them for us to read later.  I never wanted for anything and I always knew how much my mom loved me.  I still do.

Hunter gave me a mother's day card this morning that read:  "Relax mom, do not do schoolwork."  That message resonated with me, especially now.  I am not returning to teaching full time next year, instead I will tutor and substitute teach.  As much as I love teaching, I realized that my children at home needed me more.  It was painful to give that up, but I know that my kids need to come first.  When I went back into the classroom four years ago I thought that it was the perfect time as a mom since my kids were getting older.  I was so wrong...it seems the tween and teen years are ones that require more of my attention and availability.  I need to be more present for them, and more open to enjoying the years I have left with my kids at home.   I am pretty sure that making this decision was the best mother's day gift I could have ever given myself.

Now I am off to spend time with my family and enjoy the day.  I hope you are doing the same!