I'm trying to be more open and honest on this blog. It is not easy for me, since I did share openly once and it bit me in the ass. Then I thought, ridiculous! This is my blog and I own my story.
I've had some family stuff going on with a very close extended family member who decided to push me aside to accommodate another family member's feelings. This wouldn't have been so hurtful to me if I wasn't the one who actually lives near this family member and does so much with/for them.
It basically comes down to if there is another sickness, hospital stay or a death- I am not to be there. Never mind the fact that I live ten minutes from this person, talk every day to this person, take trips with this person, or come running when they need something. The fact that I thought we had a friendship, a real relationship doesn't seem to matter when this other family member decides to breeze into town after not calling, not visiting for over three years- not even bothering to answer the phone when called.
I've cried ugly tears while my husband held me. I've lost sleep, gotten angry, and wanted to punch someone. Then after all of that a wave of peace passes over me and I'm okay with it. I love the saying, "Never push a loyal person to the point of not giving a damn". That's how I feel right now. I always suspected that if this other person did show up I would be pushed aside, now that it's been confirmed I feel a sense of relief almost. At least I know where I stand, and I wasn't crazy for thinking it all those years.
My husband loves me, my children love me and I have friends who love me. I'm not going to waste any more time chasing after the affections of someone who clearly doesn't reciprocate.
I love myself enough to shut the door.
I've had some family stuff going on with a very close extended family member who decided to push me aside to accommodate another family member's feelings. This wouldn't have been so hurtful to me if I wasn't the one who actually lives near this family member and does so much with/for them.
It basically comes down to if there is another sickness, hospital stay or a death- I am not to be there. Never mind the fact that I live ten minutes from this person, talk every day to this person, take trips with this person, or come running when they need something. The fact that I thought we had a friendship, a real relationship doesn't seem to matter when this other family member decides to breeze into town after not calling, not visiting for over three years- not even bothering to answer the phone when called.
I've cried ugly tears while my husband held me. I've lost sleep, gotten angry, and wanted to punch someone. Then after all of that a wave of peace passes over me and I'm okay with it. I love the saying, "Never push a loyal person to the point of not giving a damn". That's how I feel right now. I always suspected that if this other person did show up I would be pushed aside, now that it's been confirmed I feel a sense of relief almost. At least I know where I stand, and I wasn't crazy for thinking it all those years.
My husband loves me, my children love me and I have friends who love me. I'm not going to waste any more time chasing after the affections of someone who clearly doesn't reciprocate.
