I started out my 16 hour day yesterday with a 6:30 am parent conference at the high school for Sara. It was at hour 13 while lesson planning with one of my very favourite teachers from another campus that it hit me.
Something's gotta give.
I'm not super woman. I cannot do it all and keep things at the standard I want them. Do I let the house go to hell in a handbasket? Um, no- not an option. The kids? I'm all for independence, but really they are still far too young to set free. Work? Nope- love what I do. Graduate school? There it is. The all day Saturday class, four text books with multiple chapters/questions/home study/additional tutoring/home visit/research paper. Ding, ding, ding. That's it.
I e-mailed the prof this morning at 4:00 am. I explained my situation. Graduate school just isn't for me, not now or maybe even ever. It's the one thing that is tipping my stress level into impossible to manage. I don't feel like a quitter for doing this. I feel as if I just pushed away from the table after admitting that I took more than I could possibly eat. I love my family, and this was interferring with having any opportunity to spend quality time with them.
If that is what I am quitting for, then I am ok with being a quitter.
You shouldn't feel like a quitter. You can't do it all and if that was your stress point and you knew it, then you did the right thing by letting it go.
ReplyDeleteMelanie- Thank you. I just felt like the extra work load was sucking the life out of my life!
ReplyDeleteDon't feel like a quitter! Choosing family first doesn't EVER make you a quitter...in any situation!
ReplyDeleteRebecca- Thank you : ) Right now I just feel as if a two ton weight has been lifted off of me!
ReplyDeleteOh I'm so glad you realized you're burning your candle at both ends. I was worried you took on too much. I just don't know how you do it. I'm doing good most days to take a shower.....
ReplyDeleteYou did good. You're the biggest non-quitter I've ever met. You didn't quit, you just made a wise choice. There's a difference.
ReplyDeleteQuitting would have been not trying in the first place. I'm sure you're glad you tried so now you know .... maybe in the future when you have less on your plate you'll go back to it. You don't want to get bored, after all. :) (hugs)
ReplyDeleteKristin- I felt like my candle was extinguished. I was just so tired! I slept almost 11 hours last night in relief : )
ReplyDeleteNanner- I think it was too. It was just TOO much with everything else I have.
Jammie J- Exactly. I can always go back, or I could enjoy my free time and relax in the summers.
I think this is a very wise decsion and does NOT make you a quitter.
ReplyDeleteI totally feel what you're going through. It's only 3 weeks into the semester and I'm feeling the load. Not ready to push away yet but I can understand why you would.
ReplyDeleteThere's no shame in recognizing what the priorites are and making changes if necessary. You took the shot and now you know.
Milkmaid- Thank you : )
ReplyDeleteSydwynd- Yeah- sometimes you just have to say "enough".